gray. the human factor

The more 'life' I have, the more jaded I feel about some things.
The top three, in no particular order (at the time of this blogging) are
1.) Marriage
2.) God's will
3.) right & wrong

I really don't need to write about marriage, finding one's 'soul mate' or contentment because I could read what everyone else has to say about it for the rest of my life and still be at the same junction. And single.

God's will is awesome, perfect, right and out of my realm of human rationalization. Do we cheapen the holiness of God when we attribute all the coincidences in life as God's will? Or do we fail to recognize his intricate compassion for our very being if we don't? I had just turned the ignition of my car to go return a book to its owner who'd asked for it back a few days ago when my phone rang and she was checking to see if I remembered. "Must be the Lord's will" she says. Really? I don't know...

I don't claim to be in tune with God's spirit and know His will all the time. I'm just not that good. or disciplined. Am I being lackluster by not chasing after Him, normal, or safe for acknowledging that His ways are higher, MUCH higher, than mine? After all, I do believe that if I make a decision that isn't in his will, he'll turn it back into something good. He teaches lessons through our mistakes. He is capable of doing what He wants with or without me.

And when making a decision, especially bigger ones, there is so much gray area to sort through. Gray, the human factor. I think if everything were up to God, there would be a whole lot more black and white. It would be easy - love people. Have joy. Find peace. Practice self control. But there's this nasty little thing called sin. And oh, the way it plays out with human free will. Lord have mercy!
Have you ever tried to decide how to go about a situation, seeking counsel from others, taking time to weigh pros & cons, praying for guidance and still have no idea what is "right"? Of course you have, we all have. Seeking counsel from those we trust can be good because they think of perspectives and questions that were as out of your thought process as Pooh Bear never eating honey again. I'll talk with one person, kinda have my mind settled one way then talk to another who brings up equally good points and suggestions and start leaning towards the opposite decision. Ever get sick on a sea saw? That's what it feels like. Guess it boils down to having to trust God to make it clear - to ME. As I spend time with him, dwell in His word, listen. Yes, considering the counsel of others is good but you can't depend on them to make the decision for you.

And after a decision is made, the comforting thing is, its not too late for God to change things up, close the door, open up a window instead or upset the fruit basket. When involving others in big decision making, its important to be thankful for their time of listening and advice (even if it comes unsolicited) not to burn bridges and to gauge if they are a dependable support no matter where you go with the decision. While others aren't supposed to make our decisions, you may have to put up with "I told you so's", disapproving looks and a dose of humility in accepting their conditional support because you do need others to get you through.

About the worst thing we can do is second guess ourselves. If it turns out you've made a decision you regret, apologize, do what you can to rectify the situation and move on. Keep hope alive. All is not lost.